Sunday, 25 August 2013

Bluestocking - Learned Chicks & Garter Clips

Bluestocking, Bluestockingism, Education, Women,
Blue stockings.
(photo by Saffronie)

 BLUESTOCKING

Adjective & noun. Derogatory. Late 17th century.
[from BLUE adjective + STOCKING noun.]

A1 adjective. Wearing blue worsted stocking; in homely dress. archaic. L17

A2 adjective. Designating or pertaining to (those frequenting) assemblies for literary conversation, etc.
held at Montagu House in London about 1750
(where some of the men wore the blue stockings of ordinary daytime dress). L18

A3 adjective. Of a woman: having or affecting literary tastes, learned. E19

B noun. A female supporter of bluestocking assemblies; a learned woman. L18

Also: blueism & bluism noun. archaic. The characteristics or behaviour of a bluestocking; feminine learning. L18

Also: bluestockingism noun E19

Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hold your horses mankind: not only can women now vote, work, wear trousers, drink, smoke, divorce their husbands, choose their husbands and (heaven forbid) choose not to have a husband, there are also women out there who are affecting literary tastes and aspiring to be educated. This is a dangerous thing - the feminine mind cannot handle the higher intellectual pursuits. And what next? Will there be female bloggers? Authors? CEOs? Presidents? Aeroplane pilots?

Bluestockingism: that's what this is, and it's a dangerous game for all. That twittering socialite Elizabeth Montagu and her "Blue Stocking Movement" from the 1750s are what's behind this, and I've been raging about it ever since I first read of its feminine aspirations last week. And do you know the most shocking thing about these Blue Stocking meetings, where so-called educated ladies discussed literature and education? Men attended. Men! Invited male guest speakers of sufficient intellectual calibre would speak as if both sexes could share common goals. Pff. This is what it leads to - men turning on their own kind. "A learned woman" - I ask you!

Therefore, the next time a woman, girl, chick or strumpet says something even mildly-thought provoking or suggestive of her having a mind of her own, I say do not hold back, do not bother to think of a thoughtful, well-reasoned response, and do not even consider for a moment forming any kind of logical, intelligent answer. Rather, raise your hands, clap them over your ears so that her affected feminine words will not infect your superior brain, and scream "Bluestocking! Bluestocking! Bluestocking!" until she desists from her churlish impudence.

That is what this is, brothers. That is what this is.
(photo my Martin Thomas - a man)

Are you as enraged as I am about the emergence of bluestockingism?

Have you ever heard anything as preposterous as the oxymoron "a learned woman"?

Do you actually own a pair of blue stockings?

Do please comment below.

151 comments:

  1. Hahaha!
    What is the world coming to? Shame!

    ReplyDelete
  2. LOVE the slippery slope picture!! Very apt... Oh and I actually did used to have pair of those exact blue and black striped tights/stockings!

    Chlobo

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It is a rather fab picture, isn't it? And you're a literal bluestocking. Or, at least, you literally had a pair of blue stockings.

      Delete
  3. A feminist female comedian (comedienne? Aaaaaaaaaarghhhh) won the Edinburgh Comedy Festival yesterday. Now they want us to laugh at them too ed, but only at certain times, and only in a non-patronising way. I said they shouldn't get the vote, but nobody listened.

    Don't get me wrong - I don't hate women. If there were no women, who would serve those little drinks on planes, and who would pass the dentist all his stuff?

    Now excuse me while my wife dismantles bits of me with a dull knife.

    -clueless

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Stewardesses, you mean? Oh yeah. They love being called that. And I think the proper term is a "Dentist's Squeeze" (though I'm not 100% on that).

      Delete
  4. Oh yes, it was a sad thing when women allowed men to notice they were running the world.

    A woman, especially, if she have the misfortune of knowing anything, should conceal it as well as she can.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Women don't run the world Sally, and I can prove it........um.........

      ....just give me a moment.................

      -clueless

      Delete
    2. Hear, hear! To you both. I think. Umm.

      (and yes, I did spell 'hear, hear' incorrectly the first time around, as if just to prove that all men are underedumacated. Who would have thought that such pedants would read a blog on reading the dictionary, eh? Tuts.)

      Delete
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