Saturday, 18 January 2014

Capnomancy - "Where There's Smoke, There Are Idiots Trying to Divine It."

Capnomancy, Divination
"I see great changes about to befall the Earth. Animals will suffer, the globe will warm, and air quality will be markedly reduced."


Noun. Rare. Early 17th century.
[from Greek kapnos smoke + -MANCY, perhaps through French capnomancie.]

Divination by smoke.

If you haven't yet found guidance through birds, arrows, books or axes, then it's only logical that you move on to smoke - good old, ever-reliable, not in the least bit ambiguous, definitely not see-whatever-you-want-to-see-in-it smoke. Methodology does vary, as there is not yet any governing body or professional association for capnomancers. However, it's said that if you're looking at a thin, flowing plume of smoke, this portends well for you and yours. But if the smoke is thick, billowing out and spreading around you, things are going to be bad, although that's probably because you've just set the room on fire. If at any point you see Bob Marley, Jim Morrison or your ex-girlfriend's face in the smoke, you properly misunderstood what type of smoke you should be using for this divinatory practice.

Do please fire off any comments into the box below.


  1. The old stand-by. Always good for a glimpse into the old billowing futures...

    1. I knew you were gonna say that ...

      *sitting by the fire*

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